No Charges Coming - How to Keep Kids Safe in Our Community

How can our community keep kids safe when police aren't able to lay charges against those who put children at risk?

Last week we heard about a concerning incident in our local community.

First we heard about it through a Facebook post from a concerned caregiver.

And then it was in our provincial and local newspaper.

Two adults who claimed to be coaches with Football Nova Scotia began recruiting children to play football at a public field. After several weeks of practice, kids were invited to a sleepover at the coaches home.

It turns out the 'coaches' weren't certified with Football Nova Scotia and the governing body behind 'virtually all of the football teams in Nova Scotia' didn't know anything about these coaches or this 'team'.

The caregiver who helped raise concerns about this unsanctioned team also discovered that the adults claiming to be coaches were engaged in a private snapchat message with a 12 year old.

Even though there were red flags, shady behaviour, and obvious concerns for child safety, Kentville police didn't take long to let the public know that there will be no charges laid.

As child sexual abuse prevention advocates, we were disappointed that none of the news articles that we've seen have included helpful information to guide parents and caregivers when selecting activities for their children.

Football Nova Scotia president, Rob Suffron, was attributed with this statement,

"the best advice for anyone looking to sign up for any program is to confirm it with Football Nova Scotia or the local organization".

That piece of advice is worth noting.

However, we've seen recent sexual abuse scandals in Gymnastics, Hockey Canada, Alpine Canada, and weightlifting, to name just a few. This shows us that just because a coach is sanctioned, does not make that coach safe.

It was not that long ago that some caregivers tried to alert the public to the fact that Basketball Nova Scotia is not enforcing police record checks or child abuse registry checks.

Recently, Canada's Minister of Sport, Pascal St-Onge, said in an interview about Canada's Safe Sport System,

"What we're seeing is that there is no coherence right now."

We live in a country where our National Sport Organizations say,

They Can't Stop Most Abuse in Sport.

Football Nova Scotia says to check with them in order to keep kids safe. But we've seen over and over again that sports organizations are not effectively keeping kids safe.

Yes, it is worth checking with the governing body to be sure that the programming your kids are participating in is sanctioned.

But even within sanctioned programming, we must take responsibility for the safety of our children.

34% of kids are sexually abused by the time they turn 18. If we want to keep kids safe then we have to accept reality.

Reality: Many children are sexually abused.

Reality: Abuse happens in schools, organizations, associations, on teams, in clubs and within families and friend groups.

Reality: Prevention is possible. If we're willing to try.

Here's what we recommend to caregivers who want to register their children in youth programming.

1. Ask this question, "What do you have in place to protect children from sexual abuse?"

2. Look at their code of conduct. Does the code of conduct tell you how coaches/leaders will treat youth? Does it tell you what behaviours are prohibited by coaches and leaders? (you should expect to see statements that prohibit unsupervised sleepovers and private social media messaging with coaches)

3. What is their one-on-one policy? Is it in writing? (and do they take it seriously?)

4. Do they receive training that teaches the adults how to prevent, recognize and react responsibly to child sexual abuse?

An organization that is truly prepared to protect your child from sexual abuse will have this information prepared and, ideally, would offer it to you before you even have to ask.

It is alarming to find out that adults would blatantly violate best practices that keep kids safe from sexual abuse, as was the case in Kentville. Whatever their intention was, those unsanctioned coaches did not act in the best interest of children.

Safe adults need to be obvious. Safe adults need to be loud and bold about what they are doing that keeps kids safe so that unsafe adults are easier to spot.

Our goal at Priority Kids is to help organizations be loud and bold about what they are doing that keeps kids safe.

Organizations that stay quiet about child sexual abuse, or offer bland advice about keeping kids safe, are part of the problem.

If you want to be a safe adult working in a safe organization, then contact us and register for a Walk the Talk. This free service helps you to assess your organization's current strategy, and provides you with recommendations to help you take your next step.